7 November 2010

Betrothal in Islam

Dear fellow friends and bloggers,

A cousin of mine has just undergone the occasion of betrothal yesterday. She is now officially a fiancee to her fiance of course. A pre-marriage contract has been successfully entered by both of them.

At this moment, I would like to discuss on the issue of betrothal in Islam. We knew that betrothal somehow being not only as something which is being recognize by Islam but also by our custom. The Malay custom does encourage the Malays to enter the event of betrothal first before entering themselves into a marriage. There is also a custom so called as 'merisik'. This 'merisik' process is being done before the occasion of betrothal. This is to ensure that the virgin does not have anyone in favor or a choice of a husband to be. The virgin must not be in a betrothal state as the existence of such status will make the subsequent betrothal cannot be done. 

Cup Cakes for the event of betrothal

What makes people eager to enter into a betrothal or a pre-marriage contract? In my view, it is to avoid the interference or intervention from other men who may have the intention of marrying that particular woman. A woman in a betrothal state cannot accept a marriage proposal from other men except for her fiance. That is the concrete reason why betrothal has taken place. In other words, it is to avoid any other exterior disturbances.

The future Mother in-law puts on the ring

Betrothal is somehow good to all but in a deeper view, the event of betrothal also can harm the future of a particular person. Let me gives you an example. For instance, a woman cannot easily break up the tie or the relationship of betrothal just because she has someone else in favor. This is maybe due to her fiance during that betrothal period has misbehaved so she cannot pursue herself to continue such relationship. She has decided to break up the bond. The involvement between two families do make it harder for the event to take place. That is why the event of betrothal is not a toy to play but a serious matter to be taken care.

My advice to all is that do not easily entered yourself into a form of betrothal without having a certain decision with your choice. Make a choice but make it as certain and absolute. Then, insya-Allah, Allah SWT will grant you with guidance towards having a bless marriage in the future. Do not betroth too early. Make yourself available till the time you feel damn certain.

MHZ, Looking forward for a better future..

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